I've always been an incredibly hard worker. It didn't matter what it was I was doing at the time-- if I didn't have a full plate, I was lost... even now with MS breathing down my neck, I still try to do it all. My family, friends and doctors are all telling me to slow down. But I can't... because if there is one thing I like more than keeping busy and feeling like I'm doing good, it's winning. If I slow down, the disease wins. I can't have that.
Tonight went fabulous! I worked all day at the law office, came home, packed up my stuff and put on my Slumber Parties face and headed to a girl's house for her party. I wasn't expecting any kind of mindblowing night, but I always have a good time doing this "job" and knew that it would be at least decent enough. I fought the exhaustion and extreme urge I had to kick my feet up and relax when I got home... and as soon as I fought it up 3 flights of stairs with ALL my party stuff (4 duffle bags, a folding table, an incredibly heavy gun case, 3 garment bags of lingerie, 2 carry-on-type bags, and my purse), I found the energy to do what I love to do: Slumber Parties!
I thought it might be an early night for this party-- this group of girls has typically been my Saturday afternoon party girls-- noon parties only, until tonight. But we kicked back and laughed and had a great time! The hours grew longer and later... and then, my girl I had talked to about signing up to do Slumber Parties at the last party was ready to go! She was ready to sign up tonight! So we filled out her paperwork, got her signed up and ready to go, and voila! New distributor! TOTALLY unexpected for tonight's party! (I knew she'd sign up eventually-- that girl has Slumber Parties written all over her-- I just had to put her in front of a mirror first.
I got home about 1:30 a.m. and was feeling fantastic! I was exhausted, but running off the adrenaline of a good party and a new recruit... excited to have had such a successful night. And apparently... along those lines, I did something wrong. Israel took the wind right out of my sails when I walked in the door. Suddenly, I felt like I had done something wrong. I asked him how his night was and he responds, "How do you think my night went? Put yourself in my place and tell me how you think my night went." Needless to say I was caught incredibly off-guard and couldn't even respond. (Good thing I can count on my sister to answer her phone at 1:30 a.m. so I can talk about how awesome my party went... or I would have been even more hurt by his melancholy.)
So much for sharing in one's successes.
I didn't even bother asking for help unloading the car at that point. I made it up and down 3 flights of stairs... I can definitely make it up my front porch.
I shouldn't be so bothered. But I don't get it. This is who I am-- I work HARD for what I have. I work HARD because I have to.
This is who I am. This is who I will always be.
Not even this disease can keep that from being true.
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